--I had to create some ground rules for myself, which I have to constantly remind myself; I, also, give them as advice to others who ask and to my husband. The number one rule is NO comparing! I don't compare myself to other moms, and I don't compare my kids to other kids. We all have our strengths and our weakness, and it always hurts everyone to go comparing. A good example for myself in my own life is that my 3 year old started learning and repeating things back at 2 but my 4 year old was a late learning but now he is so knowledgeable about some things and always wants to learn about everything. Each of my children are smart in their own way but learn in different ways and are interested in totally different things.
My number two rule is NO keeping up with the Joneses. I don't have to do everything that I see other parents doing and don't have to keep up with anyone. I can pick and choose what works for me and my kids and what looks good to me. I don't need to do everything I see. That is the best way to get burnt out and get stressed.
My number three rule is positive thinking! I am good at putting myself down. Too good in fact. I say things to myself like how can I teach my kids when I have no college degree. How can I teach my kids when I have weakness in math and science. How can I teach my kids when I have anxiety. Well, I can! Guess what?! My 4 year old told the cashier at Chickfila that 1 + 1 is 2, 2 + 2 is 4, and 4 + 4 is 8. I had a proud moment that I am able to teach, no matter my weaknesses, and that my children are in fact picking things up.
My number four rule is to not listen to the naysayers. There will ALWAYS be naysayers for whatever you do. You will never make everyone happy. Do what you think is right and is the best thing for your family. You know yourself and your family best.
My number five rule is to always revisit my reasons for teaching my kids. Are they good reasons? And if I come to the conclusion, that they are indeed good reasons to me, I keep going. It's reaffirmation that I am doing what I want for my kids and for my family.
I love being my children's teacher. I love seeing how they react to the world around them and work through things they learn. I love answering their questions about what's that and why. I love teaching them in a way they find fun and learn the best. I love being able to give more time for those things they enjoy learning the most. My job of mother is 24/7, and I have made it a 24/7 hour job to being a teacher, also. I want to teach my kids that learning isn't only during "school hours" but all day long, every day. We can learn from something every second of every day.
5 comments:
Fantastic ground rules - especially the one about not comparing yourself to other moms!
You are a very well adjusted human being!! There is nothing that states that someone needs a college education to teach--some of the best teachers are the self taught ones!! Keep up the good work!!
interesting. i do not have rules for parenting. i'm to lazy to bother, but perhaps i should come up with at least one or two :P
What great ground rules. I don't think I have ever compared my kids to other kids, but I have compared myself to other moms and thought man, I don't do that and that or that. I can see where it would damage my self-esteem towards being a good mom.
You have good ground rules. Isn't funny, even as we grow older, we still compare ourselves to others. I wish we could grow out of that or better than that, never begin to do it.
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